(In line outside a building)
Friend 1: <Sigh> (Side-eyes Friend 2, who is studiously ignoring the former) <Siiiiiigggghhhh>…. <SIIIIIIGGGHHHH>
Friend 2: (Finally turns to Friend 1) Is this your passive-aggressive way of getting me to ask “What’s wrong?”
Friend 1: Yes.
Friend 2: Thought so. (Goes back to staring at traffic passing by)
Friend 1: You’re no fun – I can’t just complain without any prompting.
Friend 2: Never stopped you before.
Friend 1: True, but I’m trying to give you some semblance of conversational control.
Friend 2: How thoughtful.
Friend 1: …Well?
Friend 2: (Slowly turns back to Friend 1 with an exasperated look) Oh no, whatever is the matter? Please rant about it for 10 minutes with ultimately no resolution.
Friend 1: There’s no need for sarcasm.
Friend 2: Sure there is. So, spit it out – what’s wrong?
Friend 1: Oh, I don’t know –
Friend 2: Ugh.
Friend 1: No-no, that was just my introduction; ahem: Oh, I don’t know, I guess the whole post-Halloween letdown is getting to me, that’s all.
Friend 2: (Slowly blinks) What.
Friend 1: You know how it is: you gear up all October for Halloween, trying to get in the spirit of things, decorate indoors and out, dress up, watch scary movies, go to scary farms, eat all the candy, and then November 1 hits and BAM!
Friend 2: All Saints’ Day?
Friend 1: No!
Friend 2: Día de los Muertos?
Friend 1: No – wait, I actually should start celebrating that one, it looks pretty cool.
Friend 2: It’s a cultural celebration of people’s ancestors and you’d have no point of reference or understanding of its significance to truly appreciate it.
Friend 1: Food’s pretty good though, right?
Friend 2: Whatever: November 1 hits and what?
Friend 1: Oh, right: November 1, and all the fun’s over. The decorations are now pitiful remnants of good times, the costumes get tucked away to be forgotten for another year, the scary farms are regular old farms again, the movies and the candy are good year-round but just don’t hit the same off-season – in short: blah.
Friend 2: We got Thanksgiving coming up before you know it.
Friend 1: Nobody cares about Thanksgiving!
Friend 2: Rude.
Friend 1: You know what I mean: pre-Halloween build-up is fun excitement, and post-Halloween is dreary letdown. I also didn’t get to do much this year, no trick-or-treaters stopped by even to toilet paper my apartment building, and I went through all the Frankenstein movies for the first time ever with more of an appreciation for 30s and 40s filmmaking than actually being scared.
Friend 2: Wait, how many Frankenstein movies were there? I thought it was just the one.
Friend 1: (Scoffs) Amateur: (Counts on fingers) not counting remakes, there’s also Bride of, Son of, Ghost of, House of –
Friend 2: OK, forget I asked.
Friend 1: I will.
Friend 2: So, if you’re all bummed out that Halloween’s over, maybe keep up the decorations for a few more weeks and dress like a zombie or a clown when you go to work or something.
Friend 1: (Stares off into the middle distance) I already tried all that. The thrill is gone, and I got written up.
Friend 2: Well, I’m sorry to hear you’re upset with the onward passage of time, again: hold on for another 11 months and I’m certain the thrill will return once more.
Friend 1: That’s all I have to look forward to, I suppose. (They both advance one spot in the line) Spending a lovely Saturday morning on a never-ending queue sure isn’t helping my mood.
Friend 2: I’ll say. So much for early voting – by the time we get to the head of the line, it’ll be Election Day.
