Expedition Log, Day 165: I pause in the middle of my trek through the Arctic tundra to enter these notes before reaching my final goal, the North Pole. Specifically: Santa’s Workshop. The dogs who I commandeered to pull me along with the supply sled have long since abandoned us both and reclaimed their freedom – can’t say I blame them. Those supplies have dwindled to the point where I may not have enough for the return journey: water is not an issue since I am surrounded by it in a semi-frozen state, but food may be since any animals who actually live up here are scarce, I’m no hunter anyway, and plants suitable for my species to survive apparently don’t thrive in this biome. On the other hand, the journey back should be significantly shorter than the journey here since, due to a grave miscalculation, I originally found myself on the opposite side of the planet in the South Pole (the presence of penguins revealed my error).
No matter: at last, I have reached journey’s end, and am ready to confront The Man, The Myth, The Legend in his stronghold. Wish me luck!
(Explorer trudges through the mountains of snow toward a large castle, stops at the main entrance to hyperventilate a bit, and raises a fist to pound on the front door)
Santa Claus: (Opening the door before Explorer can pound on it) Ah, you made it! Come on in! (Holds the door open wider and waves Explorer inside)
Explorer: (Still standing with fist raised) Diiiiiiid you know I was coming?
Santa Claus: Of course! “He sees you when you’re sleeping”, and all that. Naturally, that’s just hyperbole: I don’t watch anyone sleeping, that’s creepy. (Explorer still stands there) So, you coming in or what? The heat’s getting out.
Explorer: Oh! Right. (Finally lowers the raised hand and rushes into a large room filled with cushioned furniture, Christmas decorations, and a huge roaring fireplace as Santa Claus bolts the door shut) This… isn’t your workshop.
Santa Claus: (Walks to the fireplace and increases the settings from “Full Blast” to “Inferno”) Hm? Oh, yes, the factory’s in the back courtyard – we moved operations off-site about a century ago so the missus and elves and I could really “go home” after a hard day’s work, know what I mean? So – (Gestures to a gigantic sofa) Have a seat! I’ll get something to warm you right up – favorite’s still peppermint hot cocoa with a little whipped cream on top, yes?
Explorer: (Sinking slowly into the sofa, full-body shaking reduced to a gentle shiver) Um, yes please, thank you.
Santa Claus: Coming right up! Think I’ll make one for myself, too. (Hums “Deck the Halls” while entering an industrial kitchen, then magics up two large mugs of hot cocoa and a plate of cookies and brings them out on a tray) Here you are!
Explorer: (Staring in awe at the tray) Wow, that’s amazing! Thanks, Santa! (Takes a mug)
Santa Claus: Ho-ho-ho, my pleasure! Cookie? Fresh out of the oven, in a manner of speaking.
Explorer: Oh sure, yes, thank you! (Takes a sugar cookie, bites into it, and closes eyes) Tastes like childhood….
Santa Claus: (Sets the tray onto a large low table and sits in an armchair) Wait till you drink the cocoa. You don’t even have to wait for it to cool off – it’s not too hot, not too cold.
(They both take a sip, then sigh)
Explorer: Heaven.
Santa Claus: Close enough. So! (Places the mug onto a coaster on the table) Now that you’re safely back from borderline hypothermia, what brings you all the way to this end of the globe, hm?
Explorer: Well, not to sound rude, but like you said earlier, don’t you already know?
Santa Claus: I do, but I’d rather hear it in your own words.
Explorer: OK.... (Takes another contented sip and then sets down the mug on a coaster) Well, Santa, I came all this way, looking for you, for a very special request. (Santa Claus nods in encouragement) I’ll keep giving presents and donating and all that, but the one gift I want this year is something literally no one else on Earth can give me, and you’re my last hope.
Santa Claus: Yes?
Explorer: This year, I want… well… I want what I lost. I want… The Spirit.
Santa Claus: Of… Christmas Past?
Explorer: No! Well, actually, sort of: I want The Spirit of the Season. That I used to have.
Santa Claus: (Chuckles) Ah yes, of course. Please go on.
Explorer: (Stands and starts pacing around the sofa) It’s hard to explain. I mean, I know I was lucky. I grew up in a great family and a great home, and Christmas was always a wonderful time of year for me – I’m not talking about the presents, it was everything else: the decorations, the snow, the cookies, the ice skating, the caroling, the parties with family and friends, the Advent wreaths, the Nativity scenes, the colored lights hung up everywhere, and just the – the –
Santa Claus: (Nods encouragingly) Yes?
Explorer: (Stops pacing) The feeling! Warmth, happiness – joy! Joy to the world, and I truly believed it! And then… and now… (Sinks into the sofa again) it’s all gone.
Santa Claus: Hm. I think that’s called “puberty”.
Explorer: Oh, Santa! (Slumps further into the sofa) I could take almost every other disappointment growing up, but I tried so hard to hold onto – this – (Waves at the surrounding room) and it still got away from me! Why do hormones have to ruin everything?!
Santa Claus: I think if we knew the answer to that, there truly would be peace on Earth. Now, you know I can’t give you your childhood back –
Explorer: (Grumbles, staring at a pillow with a giant nutcracker embroidered on it) I know, I know.
Santa Claus: (Laying a finger aside of his nose) BUT – (Explorer perks up) I can give you one day.
Explorer: One day?
Santa Claus: Yes: One Christmas Day to relive, your happiest one, from when you were, let me think… (Strokes beard in thought) yes! When you were 8: old enough to really appreciate everything, and far enough back when your grandparents and first furry companions still were with us, and you were surrounded by family and love and joy and all was right in your own world. Would you like that?
Explorer: (Stands, almost in tears) Oh Santa, that sounds wonderful, thank-you-thank-you-thank-you!
Santa Claus: (Also stands and the two hug) Of course! After all, you’ve always been on the Nice List.
Explorer: (Sniffles) I try!
Santa Claus: (Patting Explorer soothingly on the back) And if this’ll keep you from tracking me down at home in the future….
Explorer: (Pulls back) Oh Santa, you’ll never see me ever again! One day, from when I was truly happy, will be enough to last all my life!
Santa Claus: I certainly hope so.
(Explorer, age 8, wakes up on Christmas morning)
Explorer: (Jumps out of bed and runs to the living room) It’s Christmas, yay!
(Family members are sitting on the floor and in chairs facing the Christmas tree; snow is falling gently outside, carols are playing from a speaker nearby, and the smell of pine and cookies fill the air)
Family Members: Merry Christmas!
Explorer: Merry Christmas, everybody! (Goes around the room hugging parents, grandparents, siblings, and a cat and dog) This is the best Christmas ever!
(Back in the North Pole, Santa Claus is seated on the sofa and watches the scene on a flat-screen television above the fireplace as Mrs. Claus enters from another room, wearing overalls and taking off work gloves)
Santa Claus: (Turns away from the screen) Hello, dear; how was the factory today?
Mrs. Claus: (Puts on a cozy velvet dress over the overalls) Everything’s running smoothly, love: I finished fixing the video game generator for when you take over on tomorrow’s shift.
Santa Claus: Splendid, thank you! (Turns back to the television and watches 8-year-old Explorer and family opening presents)
Mrs. Claus: (Walks up behind the sofa to watch) Manipulating the laws of time and space again, are we?
Santa Claus: Hm? (Turns back to look at Mrs. Claus) Oh no, this is all in that child’s head. (Points to Explorer on the screen) Well, that child’s actually an adult now, and the one thing wanted for Christmas was the Spirit of the Season that was lost at some point, so I gave the gift of reliving good memories. Came all the way up here to ask and everything.
Mrs. Claus: Ah, so that’s why you wanted today off. Why didn’t you just tell me?
Santa Claus: Well, there was an off-chance that even though the trek was long, this one’d turn tail and head home at the last minute, so I didn’t want to spoil things by mentioning it out loud beforehand. Superstitious, I know, but there it is.
Mrs. Claus: Understood. So your guest is all snug in bed at home right now?
Santa Claus: Mm-hm. And having a wonderful dream, if I may say so myself. Even though it’s from memories, I made it happen.
Mrs. Claus: Uh-huh. I thought you didn’t watch them while they’re sleeping?
Santa Claus: …Well, I’m not watching the person, I’m watching the dream.
Mrs. Claus: Ah, got it.
Santa Claus: (Turning full attention back to the screen) Troublemaker. (Mrs. Claus chuckles)
(On the screen, Explorer looks around at the happy scene and then up at the Santa Claus tree topper)
Explorer: (Whispering) Thank you, Santa.
Santa Claus: (As Mrs. Claus lovingly squeezes his shoulder; he pats her hand and takes off his glasses to brush away a tear) I love my job.