(In an apartment, Ego is tidying up the place while on the phone)
Ego: And since I’m currently between soul mates, I decided that this year I’m going on a Valentine’s Day date with myself.
Friend: (Voice on the phone) Good for you! It’s always nice to treat yourself, I say. I’m actually kind of jealous: The Other Half really wanted to go to the ballet this year so I’m bracing myself for that snoozefest tonight.
Ego: (Adjusts the living room window blinds) Bummer.
Friend: It really is. But, I can’t complain because afterwards we’re having dessert at Rock `N Roll All-You-Can-Eat Sports Bar, which The Other Half has to take two aspirin to endure so, you know: True Love, and all that.
Ego: (Lighting several candles) Yeah-yeah, sure-sure. (There is a knock at the front door) Ooh, sorry to cut you off but my date’s here, have fun, bye! (Runs to the door, tossing the phone onto a dishtowel lying on the kitchen counter)
Friend: But I thought you were – ? (Disconnected)
(Ego unlocks the front door to reveal Alter Ego)
Ego: (Beaming broadly) Hi!
Alter Ego: (Carrying a large heart-shaped box of chocolates, a bouquet of chocolate roses, and a container of hot chocolate mix) Hi. I wasn’t sure what you’d be in the mood for so I brought all of them.
Ego: Excellent. (Stands aside) Come on in!
(Alter Ego enters and they both go into the living room)
Alter Ego: (Setting down the desserts on a coffee table) So, what’ll it be tonight? Fancy dinner in, sci-fi movie during dessert, maybe a foot pampering session thrown in for good measure?
Ego: (Holds up a foot spa bath) You know me too well.
(At dinner in the dining room/kitchen)
Alter Ego: (While munching on the entrée) Mm-mm, this is delicious.
Ego: Why, thank you. (Slyly sips from a flute of sparkling water)
Alter Ego: Have you been taking those cooking classes you were thinking about a lot recently?
Ego: Indeed. I’m glad you noticed; it really is money well spent.
Alter Ego: I’d say: (Holds up a forkful of food) this has been braised to perfection.
Ego: (Waves dismissively) Oh, stop, you! (Tilts head in thought) Me?
Alter Ego: And the sides! Healthy, yet savory. (Does a chef’s kiss) Brilliant.
Ego: It’s so nice to have one’s effort appreciated.
Alter Ego: Well, I certainly appreciate it. And I was going to do this already, but definitely leave all the dishes and clean-up to me!
Ego: You say the most magical things.
(Later on, Ego and Alter Ego are sprawled across the living room couch watching a movie by candlelight and snacking on the chocolates while Ego’s feet are in the bubbling spa bath)
Alter Ego: (Points to the screen) Don’t you just love it when the soundtrack has themes for certain characters that pop up over and over again throughout the film?
Ego: Yes! Hardly anyone I watch movies with seems to notice that, and they act like I’m making it up!
Alter Ego: I don’t know about them, but I think it adds such a rich layer of subtext to the entire work – a real treat for the ears that’s extremely underappreciated, in my opinion.
Ego: Exactly! You get it.
(By the time the movie ends, both are dozing off)
Ego: (Blinking awake as the credits roll loudly, looks around at the mess of candy wrappers on the couch and floor) Ooh, did we actually eat all this?
Alter Ego: Well, you certainly did.
Ego: Heh-heh, yeah.
Alter Ego: And on that note – (Stands) time for me to, unfortunately, buzz off.
Ego: Oh. (Tries to stand but sloshes around in the foot spa bath instead; dries off feet with a blanket and kicks aside the bath) Is the Valentine’s Day date over already?
Alter Ego: Why, you wanna go out clubbing or something?
Ego: (Shudders) Ooh, I don’t think I can handle that anymore at my age. OK, well, thanks for a lovely Valentine’s Day, then.
Alter Ego: My pleasure.
(They both walk to the entrance)
Ego: (Unlocks and opens the front door) So: same time next year?
Alter Ego: You sure? You might find a new soul mate by then.
Ego: (Thinks for a few moments, then shakes head) Knowing me, I doubt it. Besides, I learned something new from our time together tonight.
Alter Ego: What’s that?
Ego: I like this better.
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