Story 223: Binge-Reading

            (Co-Worker 1 sees Co-Worker 2 slump onto the chair at the adjoining desk; Co-Worker 2 has bleary eyes, messy hair, and an all-round dissipated look)

            Co-Worker 1: Wow, you look hideous.

            Co-Worker 2: I know.

            Co-Worker 1: I mean it – you look like someone literally rolled you.  In garbage.

            Co-Worker 2: Thanks.

            Co-Worker 1: I mean, your face –

            Co-Worker 2: I need you to shut up now.  (Holds head while taking five aspirin)

            (Co-Worker 1 tries to go back to work, then turns to face Co-Worker 2 again)

            Co-Worker 1: All right, spill it: did you go on an actual binge this weekend?

            Co-Worker 2: (Lying head on desk) Of sorts.

            Co-Worker 1: I knew it!  You always say you don’t drink, but this place drives everyone to it – I knew it was only a matter of time – I had a bet going with –

            Co-Worker 2: It wasn’t alcohol.

            Co-Worker 1: Huh?  Oh.  (Peers into Co-Worker 2’s face) Ohh, now I know that look.  You binge-watched something all weekend, didn’t you.  Let me guess: all 27 seasons of Sword Slash?

            Co-Worker 2: Hardly.

            Co-Worker 1: All 15 films of the Astro Conflicts saga, including the animated series and the short-lived puppet show?

            Co-Worker 2: No!  (In a small voice) I saw those when they came out.

          Co-Worker 1: (Leans in again, conspiratorially) No one else has to know – it was Hearts Restrained by Corsets and Honor, wasn’t it?

            Co-Worker 2: Ew, no.

            Co-Worker 1: All right, it’s just that some people enjoy the writing on that show, you know.  Nothing to be ashamed of.

            Co-Worker 2: (Leans back in chair to administer eye drops) Well, you’ll never guess because I didn’t binge-watch anything; I actually binge-read.

            Co-Worker 1: Binge… read?  As in, a book?

            Co-Worker 2: Yes.  With words and everything.

            Co-Worker 1: Are you taking an English class or something?

            Co-Worker 2: No; I’d always wanted to read it, that’s all.  We had the snow this weekend, so I thought it was as good a time as any.  Got a comfy blanket, got some tea, played some soothing piano music, and… read.

            Co-Worker 1: Wow.  What did you read?

            Co-Worker 2: All three books of The Master of the Bangles.  Although, I don’t know if I can really count that as three separate books since they were originally published as one large volume.  Took me from Friday night through to 3:00 this morning, with five-minute breaks for whatever.

            Co-Worker 1: You read that?  I don’t get it – why didn’t you just watch the movies, you’d’ve been done in half a day!

            Co-Worker 2: (Gives a withering look) It’s not the same.

          Co-Worker 1: It’s close enough!  The filmmakers said they were very faithful to the source material!  And how’d you even finish those things in one weekend anyway, they must have been over a thousand pages long!  Each!

            Co-Worker 2: Grand total was 1,372.  Including the appendices.

          Co-Worker 1: Appendices!  I’m not working that hard for something that’s supposed to be entertainment!  (Sees alert on phone) Ooh, the next installment of the unauthorized Sword Slash Encyclopedia was just released.  (Sees Co-Worker 2 staring) It’s not the same!

          Co-Worker 2: Well, you binge on whatever you want to binge on – I personally feel very fulfilled in reading what is considered to be a classic, and my brain feels all the more enriched by the experience.

            Co-Worker 1: Whatever you say.  A binge is still a binge, though, and you feel slightly gross and ashamed afterwards no matter the material or the medium.

            Co-Worker 2: (Cradles head on arms, leaning on the desk) At the moment, I couldn’t agree more.

             Co-Worker 1: (Hesitates) Got something lined up for next weekend?

            Co-Worker 2: (Perks up) Oh yeah: The Complete Collection of the John Houses Mysteries, Unabridged.

            Co-Worker 1: Nice!  Mind if I come over and binge-read those with you?

            Co-Worker 2: If you want, but you’ll have to wait until I finish at least the first set – spoiler alert, the last set is shorter because the author killed off the main character so he could end the series.

            Co-Worker 1: It’s not a spoiler if it’s been published over 100 years ago.